Sunday, May 20, 2007

Hot Guys- Frum v Non-frum

Throughout my four year stint at Brooklyn College, I've met many guys. Jewish, Orthodox, Athiest, Christian, --you get the picture.

Off the bat, I can name you about 5 non-frum really hot guys. The thing about them is, well, obviously I don't feel threatened by them since there's no chance. But also, they're not cocky. They act like everyone else, they're just hot. But they walk and talk the same way the ugly people do. Girls aren't all over them like a cheap suit. Sure, when they walk away, we talk about how hot the guy is, but we wait till he's gone, because it feels like he doesn't know it.

That's not the case with the frum guys. As we know, they come in very limited quantities, and the frum hot guys I've met KNOW IT. They know they're hot. Probably because all the frum girls fawn over them, and throw themselves at them. They're always surrounded by frum girls who are competing for the spotlight.

Hot frum guys become players. They have a way about them. I can't pinpoint what it is, though. It's a general attitude of, "I know these girls are gonna chase me." The few times I've been in the caf, and sat with these people, I was tempted to just laugh. I contributed to the conversation, but watching these girls flirt, as if they're all gonna get a piece of him, was pathetic. (And possibly true for all I know) I always see these frum guys with different girls hanging on them..and since the idea of platonic relationships with frum people is so lost, they're always flirting with one another. After spending much time in a same-sex environment, this co-ed environment becomes too hot for them to handle. The guys are happy to be hanging out with girls without the threat of being kicked out of yeshiva. Same for the girls.

These guys also find the need to boast about how they never do any work in school, and how they party. Do any hot frum guys actually do the work for school? Because many of the non-frum ones I know do.

I have yet to meet a hot frum guy who is as smart and modest as the non-frum ones.

And that sucks.

17 Comments:

At 5/20/2007 8:00 PM, Anonymous esther said...

cant comment on this post.
but- where are the hot frum guys?

 
At 5/20/2007 8:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

if this is their personality, why do you think they're hot? "hot"ness is not only physical, it's very much based on personality. or it should be.

 
At 5/20/2007 8:21 PM, Anonymous Hesh said...

Funny you say this because I say they same thing about girls. Non-frum girls tend to be more worldly, independant and less materialistic as well as having way better figures.

But non-Jews are all together way hotter then Jews in general. On top of this people are hottest in the mountain and pacific time zones and ugliest in the central time zones. Texas by far being the hottest state even though it is mostly in the central time zone.

 
At 5/21/2007 6:43 AM, Blogger Michelle said...

Anon--good point. I meant purely physical.

Hesh- If I'd write that, people would say I'm jealous of the hot girls. So I chose to stick to the guys. I have some very pretty friends who aren't like that. But it's their natural beauty and features, not 10 lbs of make-up.

As for non-frum girls having better figures- yes, since unfortunately many frum girls starve themselves trying to get learning guys who'll only date size 0s, whereas most non-frum guys like girls with meat on their bones.

 
At 5/21/2007 11:17 AM, Blogger Student said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 5/21/2007 12:26 PM, Blogger Scraps said...

That does suck. It's really a shame that guys (and girls) who would call themselves frum feel compelled to act that way; aren't we supposed to be better than that?!

 
At 5/21/2007 9:45 PM, Anonymous Xvi said...

I dont know Michelle,

sounds a lot like bias and lack of exposure to me. I just get the feeling that you have drawn huge, sweeping conclusions based on isolated case studies and its just not the case.

There are going to be egotistical man-sluts, frum or not, and equally nice, and attractive guys whether frum or not. Same for women. I have never seen any stronger correlation based on level of religiousness.

Maybe Im wrong, but thats how Ive seen it.

 
At 5/21/2007 10:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Xvi,

Great point, but how many Jewish ego-less guys do you know? Girls?

Do Jews have less defining features to call their own than non-Jews do?
In order to date and marry, a Jewish singlite needs to be conventionally good looking (or else they'll be called nice, GASP!) and have $$ signs floating around somewhere nearby.

With non-Jews, there's a job, how intelligent/intellectual one is,how well one can communicate with others.. how well s/he can fend for themselves in the cruel dark world.. that is manhattan.

Maybe I'm just a Jewboy hater.

-ariela

 
At 5/22/2007 9:32 AM, Anonymous an old family friend said...

michelle,

so if i'm not mistaken, and i'm pretty sure i'm not, you've just told all of us frum guys out there, particularly those of us whom you know, that we are either a) not hot, or b) pompous airheads. ouch.

 
At 5/22/2007 2:15 PM, Anonymous a junior said...

i'm not quite there yet, is that really the kinda crap ill be facing in two years or so during my own 'brooklyn stint'? great...
to see some of the issues im facing check out dr. yael's next column i finally got the courage to set her straight and im bein published!
old family friend: don't act so hurt

 
At 5/22/2007 2:50 PM, Blogger Shoshana said...

Hey... Im hot and smart and frum....and I even look good in pink... :) ...

 
At 5/25/2007 1:32 PM, Blogger Notsofrummie said...

I remember when i was in brooklyn college, it was the 'hot' guys as well as the quasi good looking guy but was was rolling with dough that kept on having the ladies flocking to him. Also, it is possible that your version of 'hot', is the Zucker's guy in super starched shirts and fancy slacks with the acura parked outside by the meter.

 
At 5/27/2007 12:16 AM, Anonymous bryce said...

"I have yet to meet a hot frum guy who is as smart and modest as the non-frum ones."

If they're smart and modest, why do you care if they're hot? Reasonably attractive ought to be sufficient.

 
At 5/29/2007 4:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow, the days of brooklyn college. I see things have not changed.

 
At 7/09/2007 1:25 AM, Anonymous JimmyJustice said...

the girls are much worse than the guys.

 
At 7/18/2007 6:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm hot and I'm becoming Frum...How do I stop myself from becoming pompous

 
At 8/26/2011 10:12 AM, Anonymous pharmacy said...

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